Skip to main content

I need to get in the picture

Awhile back there was a wonderful article in the Huffington Post about mom's shedding their fears of imperfection and getting in the picture with their children more.  And then today I was reminded of the article again when a friend shared this blog post.  As I read this blog tears filled my eyes as I thought of my own sweet babies and how precious and perfect they are to me.  One of my greatest fears is that my terrible memory will erase all the moments I want to remember.  I fear that I will forget what Austin's head feels like nestled in my neck as he sleeps on my chest.  I fear that I will forget Jackson's first smile that early morning when it was just the two of us and he only 6 weeks old.  Or Austin's gentle and wise smile that shows more wisdom than his little 21 month old life will allow.  Or how Jackson's little face glowed by the light of his biliruben bed when he was born with jaundice.  These are the moments I want to keep deep inside forever, so that I can relive them over and over again as I need.  I am guilty of shying away from the camera because I don't want to be remembered with my hair in a ponytail and no make-up.  I hide from pictures because I hate how much I weigh and I'm usually in a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt anyway, but the reality is that that tired woman that I'm afraid to capture in hard copy is the same woman that is the mother of my children.  And no one will ever love them like I do.  Thank you to the women who remind me of the importance of capturing moments in pictures no matter how much I knit-pick at myself.  I can still feel what it was like sitting in my own mother's imperfect lap and how much I loved listening to her breathe and talk.  Looking at pictures of the two of us when I was small and she, too, hated being in pictures takes me back to when I was a child at that moment and I relive it all over again.  How grateful I am for her and for the pictures I have of the two of us.

Here are a few of my "mommy moments" that, thank heaven, have been captured.

Jackson (3 weeks) and me

Jackson (1 year) and me

Austin (1 year) and me




Comments

  1. AnonymousJanuary 15, 2013 at 3:08 PM

    Great post, Raylene. And, just so you know - you are beautiful and your soul radiates in each picture. I have loved that about you since meeting you in RS so eight years ago :) Your boys are blessed to have you as their mother! -Arika

    ReplyDelete
  2. RayleneJanuary 16, 2013 at 5:30 AM

    Arika, you are so kind, thank you.
    Can you believe that it's been 8 years since we met. That's crazy!!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Easter 2012

This year we had our big family Easter dinner on Friday because Grandma had to work on Sunday. I tried out a new recipe for dessert which I found on Pinterest (of course). It's a super rich chocolate brownie cake. It turned out great, but was a little too rich for my taste. However, I really think that if you are a true die-hard chocolate lover then you will LOVE this recipe . I thought I was a true die-hard chocolate lover, but this cake beat me. A good friend of mine makes Easter cupcakes with her kids every year. I saw them on her blog last year and I thought they were so cute! This year we made them at our house to hand out to our neighbors. Jackson helped with the baking and decorating. He has some mad grass and egg decorating skills! He also decorated the plates that we handed out the cupcakes on. Our neighbors were quite impressed with his work. For some reason I still get these little momentary realizations that I'm a mother of two, and I get this rush of emo...
3 comments
Read more

BABY NUFFER #2 is on his/her way!!!!

That's right, we were waiting to tell everyone, but today we had our second appointment and the second sono and Baby Nuffer #2 is doing well. Most of you know that we had a miscarriage in June after struggling with infertility, it was a very devastating time for us. We were "advised" to wait a couple cycles before trying again (and we were going to take the advice), but a little voice, I know now it was the Spirit, told me we should try again as soon as possible. I talked to Jim and he agreed and sure enough baby #2 is on it's way again! This little one is very healthy and has a strong heartbeat!! We aren't out of the woods yet, I'm just under 9 weeks and at 12 weeks our chances of miscarriage drop significantly. I don't feel we'll be out of the woods until I have our little baby in my arms, which will only give me a whole new set of stresses to worry about. ;) This is Baby Nuffer #2 at 6 weeks and 5 days. If you look close it's off to the ...
5 comments
Read more

George Albert Smith challenge

Last Sunday we started the new lesson book in Relief Society over President George Albert Smith. I was really impressed by the 11 "ideals" that make up his personal creed. You can read each of the 11 ideals from his personal creed here . I wish I could say that I am already living ALL 11 ideals, but that's not the case. So I'm challenging myself to take one ideal a month which will take me through November and honor that ideal by living it somehow (it will vary each month with each ideal). I will try very hard to do something representing all 11 ideals in the month of December. I will update the blog each month with whatever good deed or service project I have come up with for each month's creed. Writing about my monthly challenges is not to be boastful or prideful, but rather to ensure that I follow through with my challenge. You are welcome to take the same challenge. I would LOVE to hear about how you live each creed! January's creed: "I will...
2 comments
Read more